Just For One Day
Wouldn't it be wonderful to see everything through the eyes of a toddler?
The Good Lady enthused.
Her eyes gleamed as she looked at the Little Boom who was engrossed in playing with an Amazon delivery box. Little did he know or care that one of his Christmas presents had been inside.
He was stepping inside it, then outside it, putting it on his head and running about. All the while giggling in that way that two-year-olds have that make us old cynical adults realise how shit grown-up life can be.
To live like a toddler for a day. That would be something wouldn't it?
She asked me, her head tilted to the side as she dreamily imagined the wonder and awe of having that toddler view on everything.
I looked up at the ceiling and imagined such freedom.
Hi, can I have a skinny latte with an extra shot, please?
Oh, sorry, sir. We only have full-fat milk. Will that be ok?
Raaar!?!
I go berserk and smash up the shop whilst screaming in insane rage before shitting myself and throwing myself to the floor in floods of tears.
BoomDawg, can you stay late tonight? We really need to get this report done?
El Jefe asks in his sweaty way.
I take a moment to consider before my bottom lip trembles and I go berserk, throwing everything off my desk and punching El Jefe in the face, then I throw myself to the floor and continue to scream whilst kicking myself round in a great heaving sobbing circle.
I aim carefully before launching my yoghurt-filled spoon into the air. It clatters off the wall and yoghurt splats everywhere.
Daddy-Bear, No! We do not throw things. No more throwing!
The Good Lady hectors me.
I glare at her with my balled fists held at my sides before screaming in Viking rage and storming over to the wall and kicking it. I hurt my foot and scream all the louder before shitting myself and running into a nearby table.
Oh darling, are you ok?
The Good Lady attempts to comfort me but I ignore her and run around in mad circles shrieking.
Booby!!
Booby!!!!
BOOBY?!?!?!?!?
Wouldn't it be great, Daddy-Bear. Just for a day?
I snap out of my daydream to see the Good Lady smiling at me.
Yes, Yes it would.
I murmur, gazing off into the distance to a land of violence, frothing rage and infinite boobies.
It would be smashing.
Shared to the twittersphere in the name of the #posh and the #steem! https://twitter.com/meesterboom/status/1204002996696297472?s=09
The land of infinite boobies, a chapter that should have been in The Folk of the Faraway Tree.
It might have been an altogether more entertaining read then!! :0D
It was my favourite book as I child, endless faraway land possibilities and strange cookies to boot!
I quite liked it myself. I recently read it to my daughter and she loved it was well. That Enid Blyton had all the skillz it seems!
no man! I don't want boobies in my favourite childhood series hahahahha!!!! Add it to Noddy rather, he was already banned anyway LOL
How about, 'The Famous Five... Boobies'?
I can accept that. LOL!!!!
Should really be an even number but whatever floats your boat I guess :D
there is always one voyeur... LOL!
Read this one to my wife just now...She thought it was funny. Me? well...Still thinking about boobies.
It's hard to think of anything else!! I am glad she liked it! :0D
She's heard a few of your writes...I think she likes you better than me just based on your sense of humour. (Ok, I just made that up. She thinks you're a funny bugger though.)
I'll take funny bugger any day of the week!! I think that's been my life aim!
She's a good judge of funny bugger character...She married one...But I'm nowhere near as funny as you...
Oh, I'm sure you are! I have a fair old chuckle reading your nadgers getting mashed tales!!
Oh yeah, the old nuts copped a crushing back in the day...I think the funniest part about me is that I'm happy to laugh at myself. I do so a lot.
It's a mark of character, never a moment goes by where I'm not laughing at myself!
True dat. Some don't have the knack of it though...Many these days actually.
So many!! Sooooo bloody many just can't take a joke or take not being serious for one minute!
Life's too short for that shit right? I mean, I can be serious...Have a serious job and all...But I try to lean on the lighter side where possible. Life can be serious enough without me adding to it.
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lol as great that would be I am imagining what would have I done in those circumstances ;)
The choices world be endless and no consequences!! Hehe!
Agreed !!
:0D
Truly would be fun to be a toddler for a day. Everyone saying how cute you are and no responsibility, and a nap. Great read.
I forgot about the naps!!! Even better!! Cheers!
!BEER
for you
Cheers!!
View or trade
BEER.Hey @meesterboom, here is a little bit of
BEERfrom @eii for you. Enjoy it!hahahahahahahaha!!!! That is quite a perspective right there! LOL! You described a perfect adult/toddler combo experience lol!!!
It is Indeed! I dont know if I can take any more tantrums without becoming a toddler myself!
I think I cross between those thresholds daily hahahaha!!!
As long as you can find a way back, it's all good!! I believe that is the gift of wine! :O)
hehehe you know it ;)
Nice
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Dnice! :0)
Some people talk about buying a Lambo when crypto goes to the moon. We all know damn well that you'll buy yourself "a land of violence, frothing rage and infinite boobies."
I think it is the only option!!
Hhahaha I somehow think that is not exactly what she meant...
Lol, most likely not!!!
I'm not so sure..... the last interaction with a toddler I had ended up with them trembling with rage, literally. It was fucking terrifying.
Like that picture. Babies with adult heads is bare wrong.
It totally is wrong, the image. It always amuses me in its wrongness!
They are frightening things. The tantrums and general madness!
Congratulations @meesterboom!
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