An Intriguing Amendment

The flakes swirled in the air, striking her flushed cheeks as she propelled herself forward on the fluffy snow that sank under her snowshoes. The muscles on the back of her leg ached with the strain.

Danny walked slightly ahead of her. Graceful like a fox as he seemed to glide over the fresh snow.

Alicia had gleaned his contact information from the infamous manuscript (aka A Framework for Increasing Hedonic Experiences Between Two Consenting Adults) that he had given to her friend, Annie, after she asked him to set personal boundaries before a skiing trip up north. What was she thinking? Alicia knew very well the kind of girl Annie was and setting personal boundaries was not in her behavioral repertoire, as her old Journalism professor would have said. Perhaps she wasn’t interested in Danny romantically to begin with, or maybe she didn’t know what to make of his matter-of-fact and scientific approach to intimacy. Maybe Annie thought he was just being passive aggressive. Regardless, how can you not be the least bit curious? I mean, come on, she thought as she tried to keep up with her elusive companion ahead, the guy wrote a whole manual with clear set guidelines and boundaries!

Maybe that’s what had intrigued Alicia about him. His childlike straight-forwardness mixed with the keen mind of a sober but mad scientist. In any case, she had a nose for a good story, and when she saw the opportunity, she took it. If only she had known what she was getting into!

After ensuring that Annie was not opposed to it, Alicia contacted Danny, introduced herself, and why she was calling him. She did not hide anything and was open about her intentions to write a fluff piece for her blog about the different ways modern men try to woo women. On the phone, his voice sounded smooth and with a slight accent that she couldn’t quite place.

He laughed gently and then said something that caught her off guard.

“I tell you what. I’ll update the manuscript, put your name in it, and make a few changes. Then, if you approve of the amendment, we can go on a skiing trip ourselves, so I can demonstrate the methods and techniques I describe in the guide.”

She was silent for a moment. Then things moved fast from there. She didn't know how to ski, and she told him so.

“Then we’ll make it two weeks instead of one,” he said. “By the end, you’ll be a world class skier.”

She laughed. There was an earnestness in his voice that made her wonder if he was joking or not.

He updated the session guide by removing all mention of sexual intimacy and erotic topics, replacing them instead with the word skiing and related technical concepts. So the mad manuscript got even madder. The history of Eros became the history of winter sports. The sensory systems of erotic pleasure, transformed into the sensory systems of kinesthetic feedback. Gone were the mammary glands, replaced by skeletal structures, tendons, and ‘dormant musculatory systems’. No massages but plenty of yoga. Even the erogenous zones had disappeared and replaced by moguls and slippery ice patches and round snowy protuberances. The manuscript read like the Kama Sutra of Skiing.

Who was this guy?!

She filled out the questionnaires as he requested, though missing were any questions on sexual preferences and so forth. It was all about her general understanding of skiing, including its place in culture, society, human evolution, and so on. The survey instrument was not querying her technical know-how but rather her psychological approach, goals, and attitude towards skiing and physical activity in general. There were separate questionnaires about her athletic and self-perceived mental abilities. Strangest of all, there was a survey about her belief in and opinions of paranormal activity such as ghosts, telepathy, fortune telling, UFOs, elves, witches, and other mythical creatures like the Sasquatch. Alicia did not know what to make of that, but she answered the questions anyway. She did not believe in any of that stuff, and she was mystified about what it had to do with skiing, or intimate relationships for that matter.

After receiving her responses, he updated the manual once again to include a ‘bio-mechanical and meta-cognitive’ section, filled with circular diagrams that plotted her responses in terms of a "thrilling spatial trajectory towards becoming a world-class skier on the slopes of White Cariboo mountain.’

That was about a month ago, and now here she was with this mysterious stranger in the middle of this far away icy realm.

“We need to get to know our surroundings first," he said peering into the white canvass of snow before them. "The mountains must be our friends. They are more than our friends. They are our lovers. So we must respect them and get to know them. There are many hazards around that are not clearly visible; just like in any relationship. So you must know yourself first before you can truly experience the sweet bliss and Zen of union with the mountain.”

"Do you say that to all the girls?" Alicia asked him with tongue firmly planted in cheek.

"You're the first one I have tried to teach how to ski. So, you could say I'm also a virgin," he said with a grin and a wink.

As they meandered through the trail, he strayed from the main path and showed her some dangerous spots like tree wells. He picked up a branch and threw it at the base of the tree, where the snow had accumulated like large fluffy pillows that quickly collapsed upon impact.

"Stay away from tree wells," he said.

When they reached the lookout, and the forest sprawled before them, he fished out a small device from his vest and handed it to her.

“Just liquid flower,” he said. “To enhance the senses.”

"How do you know I partake of it?"

"Saw it on your blog. A beanie lying on your bed, small leaf on the front- it was from a selfie. So, it seemed logical to me."

"Indubitably," she said bringing the gadget to her lips.

The mountains and the forest looked sharp and in focus, wonderfully snow-capped and filled with that alpine magic that can only be found on some of the highest peaks. The soft light from the overcast sky enhanced its beauty, as if Emily Carr herself had a hand in their creation. Alicia's lungs filled with the cold crisp air. For a moment, she stared off into the distance and lost herself in thought. The world was gone. Danny was gone. Her mind raced across the forests and mountains like a ghost, and in the empty space beyond, it seemed to reach some sort of balance, oscillating in the smooth contours of the snow.

"Come," Danny said after awhile, bringing her out of her reverie with a light touch on her arm. "Let's continue, there are many more wonders down the trail."

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Part 1
Part 2

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Images generated by @litguru using Stable Diffusion

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