My Actifit Report Card: August 15 2024 - Back to the Grind - Reflecting on my Elite GC Fiasco

Today, was a challenge after what I went through yesterday. I had to go on a run to let it out otherwise I felt I was prone to explode. I went from hero to zero in about an hour or so in a gc with a combined follower count of probably about a million. In the end, I know I was given a bum rap without so much as a warning. Deep down I suspect it was gatekeeping likely a result of jealously on account of my being somewhat of a technical wizard that is when I apply my talents. Most of these fellows were influencers with your typical low following to follower ratio.

I am a different kind of person and prefer not to prune my connection to appease some silly algorithm. I value my connections with PEOPLE! The thought of that of being a metric for reach just doesn't jive with me. There are countless clout hustlers in the world of social media that sadly don't seem to see things the same way. The truth is often esoteric and high follower count doesn't mean someone knows what they are talking about. Social media metrics are often deceptive.

I put in about maybe 5 miles but forgot to activate the app until later. I used the time to do some audio journaling to organize my thoughts and actually did something for which that I am often neglectful. Giving it to God in prayer. I remember that I am to pray for those that spitefully use me peradventure they be granted repentance. Despite my feeling slighted, I don't want to hold onto it. It was, during the course of this, that I felt the sensation of a release.

I had spent some time reminiscing about my friends that I made before Steem forked to Hive. The kind of people I appreciate and I still remember one of you guys giving me the role of "Brains" on our Discord. That sort of encouragement sort of pushed me to do more and more... that is until I burned out after running into indifference and animus from certain persons. I didn't really have the epiphany until now. Years I had wondered why I could do something that I wanted to do. In a proverbial sense, it was like the wind had been taken from my sails.

I think what I really need to do is not try to come up in a toxic fandom sort of situation but rather build my own thing. I have built a niche following for being a occassionally funny guy and now the cat's out of the bag about my tech skills. I don't know but I think it is highly likely I will encounter the same mental blocks if I try to serve the new community that I have been growing in. It's a weird place right for me for sure.

So, I finished up my run and went walking for a mile and a half on the phone with my dear Godmother. She is a clinical psychologists so I was wagering that she would have profound knowledge to impact. It was a bit anticlimactic as her response was more based in pragmatism. "Why do I keep putting myself in these situations to be disrespected?" Why indeed. I thought about here statement after hanging up on my way to the car and that was that. Hope you enjoyed my meandering rant. It helped me putting this out there.

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This report was published via Actifit app (Android | iOS). Check out the original version here on actifit.io

15/08/2024

5152

Running, Walking